for September 29, 2004


Happy Holiday!
by Your Diva, Robin Pastorio-Newman

Sluggo's Birthday Bash, the Court Tavern's reasonably annual homecoming event, turned up on the schedule this year on September 25th. Last year, we celebrated Your Darling's, Your Diva's, Your One True Love's favorite holiday (Sluggo's Birthday) - usually in August, if we count on the testimony of a woman purporting to be his Mom - with a buffet, a wild bar basement show, and random calls for bail money. Thus, a celebrant at this soiree can't show up unprepared. Paulie Gonazalez went out shopping for stamina-building vegetables and came home with pumpkin pie. Your Kiwi Pavlova decided it was in fact possible to like her Latin lover even more.
 
Anti-oxidants aside, a girl can't show up in any old thing; she needs a new outfit, but one that stands up as well to a mosh pit as a runway. Mamie and Your Almond Dolce commando-shopped like the professionals we were, are, and will be well into our dotage. Because this mission took place at Target, $120 brought home three pair of sharp pants, four jewel-tone long-sleeved t-shirts, five sweaters and long-wearing lipstick in a tempting wine color to die for. If you're a gentleman on a budget examining the receipts of your lovely wife's sprees, Target is a good investment, let it pay off.
 
Sluggo's Birthday Bash makes the Court Tavern look like a family reunion. Every few steps, a face one hasn't seen in years appears in the dim bar light. These are local celebrities, returning to the scene of art- and music-crimes someone should have filmed for posterity but no one did, so charges were never filed and infamy remains a local phenomenon. Tea Bag and Bad Karma played before we arrived at the bar. These bands are a good bet on a rough night in a strange dive; go see them. Yes, you. Later we saw The Skulls and Bruce Steinert's band Blackhawk something-or-other. (You remember Bruce from Buzzkill, don't you? Of course you do. Buzzkill is or was a great band, and you should pick up Buzzkill's CD Up and wait for Bruce to resurface on the West Coast. He's moving, and Blackhawk whatever-it-was is now Bruce-less, so forget about them.) Finally, the evening ended with New Brunswick's big secret True Love. If you haven't seen True Love, shame on you! You're missing something worth writing home about.
 
After the show, there are conversations. While Paulie showed a friend around his 1960 Catalina, Your Amaretto Truffle mentioned to the aforementioned friend's galpal that she was reading an hilarious book on punctuation. The girlfriend exclaimed, "Eats, Shoots and Leaves?" When delighted squeals echoed their last in a parking deck at bar closing time, we agreed author Lynne Truss was a truly entertaining - if neurotic - writer on a strange subject, and we should probably never discuss this again in public, where sensitive drunks might overhear.
 
And you wouldn't want to hurt anyone. You want to help people. When you see a superskinny deb you pray, "Oh, Lord, please let someone make her a sandwich." After hurricanes, you look up the International Red Cross and pledge your lunch money. But after a great show - when you've seen people you haven't seen in ages, when you've kissed more cheeks than a French hairdresser handing out free samples and your lipstick's still perfect, when you've heard bands you can't wait to hear again - the best you can do is spread the word: Happy Sluggo's Birthday to all, and to all, a good night.
 

©2004 Robin Pastorio-Newman