A Painter's Top 40 Story
by Stiffy Biceptz

Chronology of Events:
 
June 2002: Wife gets pregnant, probably because she kept wearing that sweet body lotion I got her for Christmas. Like a bee to a flower.
 
November 2002: Sonogram SAYS: It’s a boy.
 
January 2003: Nesting mode kicks in, husband sent to Home Depot for paint, nice blue eggshell.
 
January 19th, 2003: Priming, taping, of nursery room begins. Full day spent listening to 97.5 FM, WPST, central Jersey/Philly area top 40 music champion.
 
January 20, 21, 22: Painting, painting, painting. Four to six hours of 'PST. Room looks damn good.
 
Discussion:
 
The last time I spent this many continuous hours listening to the radio was the week before the death of WHTG-FM 106.3, the last great radio station in the world. The last time I had listened to extended stretches of Top 40 was ... never. Never more than an hour in car, just like 99% of everyone else. So it was quite a cultural experience listening to PST for 3 to 4 uninterrupted hours. I learned a few things of interest.
 
First: I was shocked at how often I heard the same songs over and over and over. In just a few days I learned all the words to Christina Aguliera’s "Beautiful", Justin Timberlake’s two new hits, "Cry Me a River", and the other one, as well as Pink's "Family Portrait", not to leave out hits by Vanessa Carlton, Michelle Branch, and Mary J. Blige. I swear I heard each of these songs at least 5 or 6 times a day. I guess they really only play 40 songs. Who decided 40? Why not 50? If you know, please tell me.
 
Second: I was impressed by the diversity, even if shallow, of the music styles presented. I heard rap, hard rock, disco, dance, semi-punk, reggae, and even what would qualify as alternative by even the most zealous of the genres’ purists. When one considers the lack of diversity in the types of stations, at least there’s some in today’s top 40 stations’ playlists. They don’t seem to care what it is, just as long as it’s in the top 40. Can’t fault them for being so democratic.
 
Third: Oh, dear God, I miss FM 106.3. I miss the days where I could listen all day long and NOT hear the same song played more than twice. You could really get some work done then. Maybe that was the most alternative thing about the station.
 
Others: Women rule the airwaves. What in God’s name is Sheryl Crow doing with Kid Rock? Good Charlotte’s new single is great, would have been big on the old HTG. The new single by Tatu is really good, reminds me of Voice of the BeeHive. If I were Britney, I’d be pissed at Justin, he got you good with "Cry Me A River". I’d also hurry back from my "break", before its too late. Not once did I hear anything by her.
 

©2003 Stiffy Biceptz